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What Year 1 as an Entrepreneur Taught Me

challenge clarity collaboration courage drive entrepreneurship growth health mindset resilience self-care

January 27th marks one year since I left my 9-5 to coach full-time. It hasn’t been an easy year. There was a lot to learn, many things to put in place, disappointments to be had and questions around whether or not I was doing the right thing. Today, I know that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing.

Along the way, there were 5 lessons I wish I had learned earlier in the process or listened to more closely, from those before me. No matter what your next big goal is, I hope that sharing what really stuck out for me will help you look at things a bit differently.

 

Make Yourself a Priority

 

I am nothing if I don’t have my health. Health is a very broad term and for me, is comprised of the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects, each critical to how I felt on an on-going basis. The foundation is physical health. When I’m feeling tired, achy, or sick, I don’t feel like doing anything and I sure am not going to show up as my best self. It took me a while to figure out what works for me and little by little I am getting there.

One of the things I want to focus on in 2022, is being more consistent in my routines and fueling my body for longevity and endurance. If I’m going to step up my game this year, I cannot do it without optimizing my physical health. That means, not only good food and exercise, but plenty of restorative sleep and scheduling downtime before I feel the need to get away. By then, it’s may already too late. So, I captured in my agenda to get some time off every quarter, so I can stay ahead of the curve and keep topping off the tank, rather than letting it run on fumes.

Emotionally and mentally, it means removing the drama from my life and if I can’t remove it, not engaging in it. Avoiding situations and people who are likely to get under my skin. Drama takes an awful lot of energy and produces absolutely nothing. It is literally throwing your time away. It’s not only time you’ll never get back, but it’s time that saps your energy and leaves you feeling drained and unable to face life. Aim for as much of a drama-free life as possible.

 

Get Clear on Your Message

 

One of the reasons I feel I haven’t made as much headway as I would have liked is because although I’m getting closer to defining my audience and what I stand for, I haven’t nailed it yet. It’s not like I haven’t thought about it. Quite the contrary! I’ve thought about it quite a bit and have experimented with different audiences, age groups, struggles, passions, and everything in between. I just haven’t hit the nail on the head with what feels good in my soul. At the same time, I know I’m getting closer because it’s getting easier to articulate when I talk about it.

Life is very much the same way. When we lack clarity about who we are, what we want to accomplish, what our goals are, we can’t make progress. How do you know what to plan, who you need to show up as, if you don’t know where you’re headed? You can try to learn new things and you’ll enrich your life by doing so but imagine how much more powerful and accomplished you would feel if you decided on a desired outcome and put all of your energy and focus there…. How much more quickly do you think you’d get there? It’s the difference between aiming at a target with a shotgun vs. a sniper rifle. With a shotgun, some of your pellets are going to hit the target. But if you want to obliterate your target, you’re much better off using a sniper rifle!

We also get in our own way in wanting to be perfect. Perfection is a myth. It doesn’t exist. We may see what others are doing and think they’re doing it perfectly, but I guarantee that in their eyes, they don’t think that and yet they don’t care. They’re trying things and people get to know them through their trial and error. By wanting to be perfect, we’re effectively procrastinating. We are hedging our bets. Noone can tell us our content isn’t good if we don’t put it out there to be evaluated and critiqued, right…?

So, I decided I’ve sat on the fence long enough and resolved that I would hit the month of Feb running and finally put this to bed with have a clear image of who my ideal client is and how I serve them. This will help me tremendously in my communication and speaking most effectively about who I am and whom I help.

 

Commit & Be Consistent

 

The first week after my retirement from corporate, I hit the ground running. For a whole week, I posted daily, did a couple of videos, announced that I had done the deed and was embarking on this new adventure. Then, my health took a downturn. I had acute back spasms, which I attributed to 30 years of corporate stress leaving my body. I literally felt I was going to die because I couldn’t breathe due to the severity of the attack. This resulted in 1 month of physical therapy. Then, I decided to take an additional month to just enjoy being and living. I was also starting to question how I was going to move forward, how to structure my day, how to attract whom I wanted to work with. Taking that additional month, was also a form of procrastination and underlying fear behind the decision.

So, what happened? I lost a lot of momentum! When I got back in the saddle, it was” crickets”… You know the feeling, that deafening silence, which allows you to hear the crickets… That meant starting from scratch and I had a good run for 9 months and then I got sick in December, probably from running hard with no break for that long and stepped away for just 1 week. Again, I felt like I took a step backwards.

My biggest lessons were this:

  • When you commit, be consistent
  • Plan for stuff going sideways and plan your week
  • Inconsistency breeds lack of trust and confidence
  • Commit to your self-care so you minimize the surprises of life, like getting sick
  • Don’t half-ass anything. Throw your whole ass in it!

 

Find Your Crew

 

One of the best surprises I had when I started building this business is the quality of the women I met, whom I knew I could rely on for support. I thought “I’m not alone! And I don’t have to do this alone!” In fact, not only did I not have to do it alone, I knew I couldn’t do it alone. So aside from the 6 must-have relationships, mentor, coach/cheerleader, challenger, confidant, collaborator, and the one you can get silly with, I knew I needed to nurture, (check out my recent blog: https://www.alexandraniel.com/blog/6-must-have-relationships for more details), I also needed to create a broader group of women business owners I could offer support for and who in turn, could support me.

This has taken most of the year to build and the journey has been well worth it. My crew is made up of ex-colleagues from my most recent and previous company, past and present clients, women I met through networking both live and online, and the women who are following a similar path and signed up for the same program I did. I feel like I have an army of strong, driven, inspiring, motivating, and encouraging women who also call me on my BS, behind me. How can I fail under those conditions!? I can’t! Funny thing is, I haven’t even met most of in real life, but I know they’re my crew!

Life is the same. We must surround ourselves with people who build us up. Yes, most of us have a family that supports us, but that is not everything. Some family members won’t support you in your life choices. When that happens, you have to create a family or a community of your own choosing, because going at life alone is no fun and gets exhausting!

 

Know When to Ask for Help

 

This was probably the most difficult but important lesson for me this year. I’m very used to relying on myself to get it all done. I also have some left-over passive aggressive, martyr tendency that I’m working through. But, if I’m not going to ask for help, why did I bother creating this awesome support system?

What does help look like? It looks like a shoulder to cry on when I need it. It looks like asking for feedback on a program title. It looks like sharing life-changing books, music and exchanging ideas. It looks like me getting my butt kicked when I hop on the woe-is-me train. It looks like a night out on the town with the girls. It looks like crazy ping-pong battles and a glass of wine after a long week of work. It takes many different shapes and is indispensable for my success.

So, I ask you… What are you struggling with right now? When will you stop carrying that cross on your own and ask for the support you want, but are afraid to ask for? Who can support you in dealing with the challenge? If no-one comes to mind, isn’t it time you started building your own crew and asked for the support you need?

 

Final Words

 

Becoming an entrepreneur is not for the faint of heart. But I would encourage you to really think about whether or not you’re following your passion, your dream, your calling or if you are in a job that leaves you feeling unfulfilled and which you dread going to every day or living a life which is uninspiring, because doing THAT is harder than anything else you will face following your heart.

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